Collecting Memories, Part 1

Oh, gift giving...it can be frustrating, maybe a little fun, and usually ends up with more money out of the wallet than planned. I had been contemplating the idea of giving experiences rather than gifts before taking on minimalism, but now I'm even more sold on the idea. So let's ask ourselves (just over a month removed from the holiday season), how often do I actually use or, dare I say, enjoy gifts that I receive? Now...family members reading this, your gifts this year followed along this same idea and you didn't even realize it (go you!).

Back in October, when Jason asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I simply answered, "a day in St. Louis." I can't remember now if he thought the idea was strange, but I did explain myself. I wanted a day, just the 2 of us, getting to spend quality time together and I had the trip mapped out by food (I consider myself a modest foodie). We were going to start the day at IKEA with an amazing cinnamon roll and then walk it off as we got lost in the super store. Then we were going to head to a funky restaurant with BBQ (BBQ is it's own food group in my opinion, and my favorite). And lastly, we were headed to a certain "factory" known for their cake made out of cheese (you know the one ;) It was such a fun day, even if it started out with me not feeling good after starting to get sick on my actual birthday. We had time to talk and work on our communication skills through GPS and big city traffic (no one yelled or got mad...yay us!). It was so nice just to get to be present with one another.

It was also in October when Jason said he knew what he wanted for his birthday - concert tickets. He kind of brushed it off and said that it would be fun, but it was next year and a lot could be going on then. I looked and the tickets didn't go on sale for another week, but I took note and let it go. The next week rolled around, I bought the tickets, and then showed him the confirmation. He didn't think I would actually get them for him, so it was a very early birthday surprise. I'll let him tell you more about the trip (see it here), but I want to say this. Both of us value the time we get to spend together and it really doesn't even matter what we're doing - as long as we're together. Both trips were more than just a celebration of the person, but time spent doing something the other genuinely wanted to do. That's the kind of gift giving we can get behind.

We have plans to continue this sort of "gift" giving with the kids this year and look forward to the memories made. Now that we're on this journey, it has become even clearer that memories and time are more valuable than a gift that won't be relevant in a month. We know this concept will be much harder for the kids to understand - they aren't in the same place as us. They only know unwrapping presents. Don't worry - we're not taking away all the fun of unwrapping gifts for them. We just agree that this idea or concept of gift giving will be more rewarding. How many years have parents been saying, "and they just played with the box"? It will be fun to see how the kids remember these trips as they grow up.

It's the same for us as adults. We don't need anything. Sure stuff wears out and need to be replaced, but right now, we're good. Gifts don't have to be tangible objects - they can all be about time. Time spent together - enjoying a meal/coffee together, exploring a city/museum/landmark, doing a hobby/passion together...it's all about being together, being present. That's the best kind of present.

I don't know about you, but I would rather have a heart full of memories than a collection of dusty trinkets.