Go Through Old Shoes

You know that one pair of shoes that just fit your feet? The ones that are scuffed with signs of hard wear. The ones that the sole flaps a little when you walk. The ones that have a permanent knot in the shoe lace because it's been there since you can remember. Those are the ones. Those are your go to and possibly your favorite. Yeah, those. They need to go.

We tend to hold on to something that is beyond repair for the sake of holding on. For the sentiment of "they're my favorite" or "I've had them forever." Shoes aren't meant to last forever. Shoes happen to be a consumable item. We wear them and when their time is done, they have to be replaced. Runners know this. Avid runners know how many miles their running shoes should have and when it's time to retire a pair, they let go and purchase a new pair for the passion. They know that running in worn out shoes isn't good for their habit of running.

So let's talk about habits. They're hard to break. On the flip side they can be hard to start, especially good-for-you habits, like eating healthy and exercise. Bad habits are so easy to start and can turn themselves into an addiction quickly. How many of us are guilty of picking up our phone first thing after waking up? How many of us are guilty of mindless scrolling of social media during our morning habit of coffee? What about while driving? At work? At lunch? At family dinner? At church? Do you see where I'm going? What once started out as an innocent click to share something funny or a cute photo of our children has now become this habit that is consuming most, if not all, of our time. It's like the old pair of shoes..."just one quick check," "oh, that's too cute not to share," "quick, let's take a selfie and post how much fun we're having!" That one little click of the icon turns into minutes and then hours of clicking and scrolling, searching and browsing.

Recently, I upgraded my phone (was it a necessity, no...did it end up saving us money on our phone bill, yes) and switching over all the stuff from my old phone was supposed to be easy - log on, sync accounts, and voila - done! Yeah, not so much. With this upgrade, I found old contacts still in my phone and apps that I don't use or need. It also made me evaluate whether or not I needed those "old shoe" apps front and center on my home screen. So here's me...tossing the old shoes (no I'm not completely ditching social media), I'm just making it harder for myself to mindlessly "just check."

Measure Twice...Cut Once

Ahh, the smell of Home Depot...where does that smell transport you? I go back to my childhood when I'd go to the hardware store with my dad. I was taken back this weekend when Jason and I walked through the automatic doors; it was like they were ushering us in.

The project: bunk beds. I've been tucking the twins in mini cribs/mini beds for almost 3 years. And each night, I've been watching their feet slowly like through the end slats. I've searched Pinterest, page after page, and then angels started singing when I laid my eyes on a link for making crib mattress size bunk beds (ahhhh!).

I mentioned my idea to Jason and he took it from there. He drew up plans and figured out how much lumber we would need using the least amount of cuts. He wanted to get the most out of the purchase and...we did!

We did make some minor adjustments to the plans in Home Depot and after all was said and done, we had 3 small, extra boards. We were able to finish the assembly of the bunk beds in an afternoon and survived our first building project together.

This project shed some light on spending habits...have we gotten so far off track that we're not even measuring at all before making a purchase? I can't tell you the number of times I've carried around and item in the store just to leave it behind because I decided I didn't need it, or the number of times I've left a store without buying anything. Crossing their consumer driven threshold doesn't legally bind you to making a purchase befor exiting.

Measuring can be going through your closet again to make a second purge or it's asking a neighbor if you can borrow the tool you need. Maybe it's doing an inventory of your bills to make sure you're using the services you're paying for, but it's also about measuring our heart for what we really need to be happy. I don't need the excess to just lay around and take up space...I don't want to have to clean around more junk! I would rather take the time to measure again just in case than make a purchase that left me wanting more and feeling less. 

I'm of the mindset of cutting the excess. How about you?

The Purge 2

Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, and before you know it the year is almost half over and you're feeling crowded out by all the junk you've let creep back in. It's daunting. It's frustrating. It's exhausting. Seriously. How did I let it start piling up again?!? UGH!

On my first trip through my junk I felt like I let go of a lot, but there was still a ton of crap when I started today's purge. And that's where I'm at...I'm in this weird in between place on this journey. Between what I want and what I really need. Some people might think it's crazy to have 5 white tanks, but when I wear one almost everyday...they are a staple item for me. Same goes for my black tanks. Those stay. End of story. But...do I really need 5 white t-shirts when I don't even wear one of those a month?

I was conservative when I went through my closet in February, but today I really looked at things that I had the chance to wear in the last 5 months and still didn't...so off they went. All of this is still a journey and each day is one step closer to living more simplistic. That's the end goal. Living a life where I don't feel burdened down by the things that surround me. The things that are part of my home. Each step of this journey has a new challenge, but I know that in the end it will have all been worth it.

Momma Pause

I recently used the phrase momma pause in an Instagram post and I'm noticing they are becoming more frequent or maybe just more intentional. Parenting is hard and rewarding, tiring and energizing, noble and crazy. We are a cable free house, as I've mentioned before, and that change was much less of a big deal than I thought it was going to be. Those moments, previously wasted by mindless TV, are now spent on things that need to be done around the house or reading (if I can string a few of those moments together) or more play time with my kids or more of these pauses.

So what exactly am I talking about when I say momma pause? I'm referring to those moments amidst the chaos when your mind hits pause and the rest of the world keeps moving. It's one of those out-of-body kinds of experiences. You're slowly raising a coffee mug to your lips and savoring the moment while the rest of the world is in fast-forward.

There are times when finding the silver lining in my day is a challenge - something happened at work or crazy traffic or the kids won't listen and you're now on your 3rd pull up since leaving daycare just 30 minutes ago after they didn't have an accident all day. Silver linings don't always catch all the light of the living room lamp, but they shine brightest when I catch a glimpse of one in my children's eyes. Like my almost 3 year old daughter counting to 8, unprompted and without any help. She had never done that for me before today, or my son coming to me to show me something and instead booping me on the nose in the cutest and sweetest little voice. This after he finished throwing a fit that had everyone saying "too loud!"

I realize this phase of parenting eventually ends...or maybe it just grows with the child. There are times its hard to look at the moment and say, "it won't be like this forever," but then I catch those little sweet moments and I'm taken by the fact that "they won't be like this forever." This is why I pause. My momma mind and heart need a moment to refocus and restart. I pause so I can start fresh and do better at catching the glint of the silver hiding in the moment.

Disaster to Declutter

Most teenagers aren't thinking about all they can declutter and donate...but this one is an exception.

The following is a guest post from Parker Karrick.

For as long as I can remember, I've always said “man, one of these days I need to deep clean my room.” Each time I would get something that I didn't know what to do with, I would just shove it in the closet and say, “one of these days…” The cycle just kept continuing until one day... when I HAD to clean my room.

One evening, I was sitting downstairs when I noticed there was some water trickling down the wall. I knew that wasn't right so I went upstairs, told my parents, and after looking into it, they broke the news to me that they were going to have to cut a hole in my closet to check out the pipes in the bathroom. (My closet is right up against the bathroom) Good news for the house. Bad news for my room. I began to unload the stuff from my closet and I suddenly realized how much stuff I had. I thought I might have a lot in there, but I had never thought this much. After about thirty minutes, I stared at my now extremely messy room and dreaded the moment that I was going to have to go through all of it.

It took them about a week to fix the bathroom and patch up the 5’ by 2’ hole in my closet and then I had to start going through the 4’ by 5’ pile of stuff that was waiting for me. Now, don't get me wrong, going through all of that was awful, completely awful, but I knew that it needed to be done. It was also very good for me to do this because it helped me realize that it was all just stuff. Yes, I had some treasures and keepsakes, but the rest of it I truly didn't needed. There wasn't going to be a day when I said “you know what I think I need…” Finally I was left with only what truly mattered to me and what I needed.

I had never thought about becoming a minimalist because I thought it was all about getting rid of everything. But I was wrong, it is about giving up some stuff, but it is about discovering what you love and treasuring it. Now, after four bags of trash and 6 bags/boxes of giveaway items, it feels great. I can't wait to see what else I can do to focus on what I love, what I need, and giving stuff away to those who need it.

In the quiet

Stress....we all have it, and for the most part don't want it or need it. I've heard that there is a good kind of stress and then obviously the bad kind. Too much of the bad and your health starts to become affected. Clearly we don't want the bad stress, but more often than not it decides to take up residence in our heart and head and then sticks around long enough to start affecting the soul.

The other morning I sat down at the kitchen table with my coffee and felt like for the first time in awhile I had a quiet moment. Quiet heart, quiet head, and quiet soul. And then it hit me, like a violently shaking wind...I had lost sight of something important. I had let stress and all its ill effects take over and had lost sight of what I needed.

I've journaled off and on since I was a young girl. It brought me peace and gave me a place to scribble feelings and thoughts. With the new year, I decided that I would try to journal and read more and I kept it up, but it soon fell to the wayside when life took over. Yeah, I used the word life. And really I mean stress....but isn't that how we confuse them? We get so caught up in the stress, some people crave it and seek it out, that we actually forget about living life. I get it. Something happens that throws off a regular routine and everything else seems to go to hell. We've lived this way, accepted this way of life for so long, that we don't even bat and eye that it's not how it's supposed to be. We've bought into the idea that if we're not stressed we're not living. Oh, how wrong that thinking is.

So in the moment of quiet, I grabbed my journal and a devotional book. Opened it to that day and there it was. A message I had needed to hear during all of the time of stress. It calmed me and ignited me all in the same. I had allowed the stress to take over and consume me. It took away my quiet. It stole from me time...time to enjoy and embrace what I've been given. The stress was slowly stealing my joy and I was allowing it because "that's life." No. No its not.

It's easy to declutter our houses and simplify our possessions, but decluttering our hearts and minds is its own challenge. We have to prioritize and let go of what is stealing our joy. We have to reset our hearts and minds to no longer accept the lie that stress is feeding us. It's time to put stress in its place and allow joy to take over.

Take advantage

Weeknights are busy and cluttered with scheduled events and the everyday life stuff like dishes and laundry and night time routines. This is why the couple of days that make up the weekend are so important to us with our kids. We get the (mostly) uninterrupted time to just spend quality time with them. Last weekend just happened to also be a long one with the boys being out of school and me being off work for a Monday holiday. You wanna know what we did? We went to the playground.

Yep...but not just one, we hit up 5 in 2 days! AND added an extra stop at the nature center. And you wanna know what else? The kids loved it! The weather was amazing all weekend and we took advantage of being outside for play. City park playgrounds are free (just in case you haven't been in awhile).

We also took advantage of it being a week day when a free indoor playground was going to be open. The total cash out of pocket for our amazing family weekend...$19 ($2 for a movie rental, $17 for ice cream).

The weather in central Illinois won't always be 70 degrees in the middle of February, but when it is, take advantage. Our weekend wasn't amazing because it was free, it was amazing because we had the chance to say, "let's go to the park" and not worry about the clock. We had the chance to keep the kids surprised about what we were going to do next because we didn't have anywhere else to be other than with them. We had the chance to see all the kids play and explore together. We took the chance to say yes to ice cream before dinner (I mean, who doesn't want ice cream before dinner?).

We took the chance to soak up this time with them...time that seems to be going way too fast. We took advantage of the free and it held way more value than we could have known.